Miracles in a Coin Purse

 There are people who doubt or question God's existence because they have not seen grand miracles in their lives, but it is most often in the everyday miracles that God works.

Twelve to thirteen years ago, when I was serving a mission in Guatemala City, on a bright, sunny, and hot day on the coast, my companion and I had a meeting in a different area. While there, we stopped at the ATM to withdraw money because buses and taxi-like services were common. Before climbing onto the bus, I felt like I needed to put only the amount of the fare in the coin purse I carried, while the rest of the money went into the bottom of the backpack. I did not know why, but I did not question the feeling because I was accustomed to being cautious.

On the bus ride back, two men climbed onto the bus, threatened the driver, and stood at the front of the bus where they demanded money from everyone and walked past every seat. The first woman hardly had anything, and one of the men waved a gun at her, asking, "Is that all? Do you swear you don't have anything more?" I should have been terrified but was not. I simply pulled out the coin purse and held it up as they passed. The man took it, and then he did something that could have made my heart stop—he rubbed it between his fingers. There was nothing in there but two small coins. He should have threatened me the same way he did to the woman at the front. But he didn't. He walked past and continued to collect money until they jumped off the bus. I don't know if he felt money inside that did not exist or if he thought it wasn't worth his while to threaten a foreign girl, but what I do know is that it's evidence that God does watch after us.

God does not prevent bad things from happening all the time because he won't interfere with anyone's agency, and sometimes, he will allow them to happen because we need to learn something, but if a miracle like I experienced isn't evidence enough that he cares about us, I don't know what is. He is real. He loves us. He has not forsaken us.

Like A River

 

Several places in the scriptures talk about having "peace... as a river." 1 Nephi 20 states, "O that thou hadst hearkened to my commandments—then had thy peace been as a river, and thy righteousness as the waves of the sea." Isaiah 48 says the same thing.

I have been around rivers all my life, and I have never seen a completely peaceful river (although St. John's Bayou and the Mississippi are fairly calm on good days), so the more I read these verses—all of the ones addressing having peace like a river—I can't help but wonder what could this possibly mean? Will my peace be rambunctious and unpredictable, or my life be tossed about like the waves of the sea? Could it mean that I will have ever-flowing peace, perhaps? The latter supposition sounds more reasonable, but maybe, just maybe, the former does apply.

A river can be dangerous when the levels are high or when the wind blows. Some rivers have hidden dangers, such as large river monsters, snakes, or piranhas. However, if you stand and watch a steadily flowing river like I have, you realize it holds many beautiful lessons. First, a flowing river is more pure than a stagnant one. Although most water sources, even rivers, have impurities or bacteria that humans should avoid drinking, a flowing source is better to drink from than from a pool. Peace like a river must then be clearer or easier to understand. When we feel that calm, warm feeling, we'll know that we are feeling true peace.

Second, a river constantly moves items along. I once wanted to see how fast the river was flowing, so I threw a stick into the river to calculate its travel over a certain distance. The stick never sank and never stopped. It kept moving along with the river until it left my sight. I'm confident that the peace we can receive from Jesus Christ will buoy us up and help us keep going even in the crazy journey of life, aiding us to avoid getting stuck along the way just as the river moved that stick onward.

There is something else that a river moves but is underneath its surface: rocks. As the river tumbles the rocks, the rocks become smoother. I don't know if having our peace like a river means that things will necessarily smooth out, but the promise I hold onto from the scriptures is that the peace we'll have will be greater than we now have, and that sounds like a good promise to me.

Unfortunately, our lives are ofttimes unclear. The answers we want don't always come or they come and then turn into something else we weren't expecting. We might feel prompted to step back after we've done all we thought we could do and have seen some good results, only to see that our stepping back didn't yield the final results we hoped for. But we have been promised peace, and even if that peace is sometimes bumpy or unpredictable, at least it's flowing.

The Sermon of Faith

 "Consider the lilies of the field." A set of scriptures from the Sermon on the Mount, starting with these words, came into my mind earlier. They're a good reminder to stop worrying or, at least, to live life more fully. Starting with these powerful words and having all of those scriptures emphasized during the final talk of our sacrament meeting today, I put the lessons into a poem. It's strange that the messages during the meeting went from the priesthood to Star Wars lessons to the Sermon on the Mount, but all of it has a basis in exercising faith. The priesthood power is activated by faith. Luke Skywalker could not blow the reactor on the Death Star until he closed his eyes and trusted in the force. And how can we have peace if we are unwilling to leave everything in God's hands and trust Him to take care of us and our circumstances?

Tomorrow often sounds dismal and dark,

And fear and control never take a rest.

Worry holds us back from moving onward.

Maybe, just maybe, closing your eyes is best.

Leaping by faith into dark paths is chancy,

But, surely, not all that is dim leads to death.

The flowers and birds are fed aplenty,

They expect nothing and are, yet, given breath.

Why fear humankind, whose lives are short?

Why not move forward from failure and scorn?

Taking a step forth is all that's required–

The words will be given, and our burdens borne.

We are in the details of a larger work,

And some days it seems we are put to the test,

If the next step looks like the deep abyss,

Maybe, just maybe, closing your eyes is best.

Rejoice with Me

Lost By the Bay

 "And he spake this parable unto them, saying,

What man of you, having an hundred sheep, if he lose one of them, doth not leave the ninety and nine... and go after that which is lost, until he find it?

And when he hath found it, he layeth it on his shoulders, rejoicing.

Either what woman having ten pieces of silver, if she lose one piece, doth not light a candle, and sweep the house, and seek diligently till she find it? And when she hath found it, she calleth her friends and her neighbors together, saying, Rejoice with me; for I have found the piece which I had lost" (Luke 15:3-5, 8-9).

It is easy to fall into the habit of thinking no one notices us or cares about us. It is more logical to consider the billions of people on Earth and say to ourselves, "Who am I? What good can I do? What purpose could I possibly serve among so many."

Oh, my friends, if we could only comprehend more fully how necessary we are—how marvelous, loved, and wanted we are. And I think I'm only beginning to grasp the concept.

Have you lost something important before? Something that you could probably live without, but it meant something to you? I have. In fact, I recently lost something I needed for work, and as much as I searched for it—I recleaned my bedroom, checked the bathroom just in case, looked in the dryer, checked outside, searched my car—I could not find it. And I prayed. And I prayed again. And God didn't tell me exactly where to find it right away.

It was important to me, so why didn't He just tell me? He knew where it was, didn't He?

Instead, He told me to clean my backpack and to change my bedding, and did I find it? No. But finally, when I was at breaking point and knew I had searched everywhere and had done all I could, He opened my eyes, and I found what I was looking for in the thinnest, darkest area next to a stack of towels. How did it get next to the towels?!

But it was there. And I was overcome by joy and gratitude.

And I'm pretty sure that's how Heavenly Father sees us. When we've done something wrong or feel like we aren't needed, or we wander away because people have hurt us, or maybe we feel uncomfortable around religious people because sometimes they can be too judgy, so we avoid everything relating to God, He hasn't given up on us. He could easily kick our stubborn mortal butts and tell us to get back in line, but He doesn't. He looks for us, watches for us, and then welcomes us with open arms so He can give us a big hug when we are found.

And when we return to Him, I'm sure He's saying to all of the angels, "Rejoice with me, for I have found the [one] which I had lost." 

Don't Forget the Darkness is Followed by the Dawn

One day as I was driving to work, I contemplated some of the difficult things I was dealing with—exhaustion, work, trying to fit in, my own struggle with my self-esteem, and health. The list might have continued, but as I looked at the sun coming over the mountain, it symbolized my journey. Each of us has to climb some pretty big metaphorical mountains in our lives. Sometimes, those mountains are piles of dirt and rocks, sometimes of big boulders and stones, and other times of silt and sand (those ones sound the most tiring). Do you know what’s good about mountains, though (Other than they keep tornadoes out)? Either there’s a tunnel that goes through the mountain to help you get to the other side or once you reach the top, you can look down and see the valley.

There are rough days or weeks or years, and would we like to skip out on those experiences? Of course, we would, but every day or week or year that seems to push us down in the muck isn’t the end because the end will be beautiful. And if it’s not wonderful and beautiful, it must not be the end of our journey yet. How I wish I could reverse time to ten years ago and hug Corey or Sam or Evan and tell them to hang on because the uphill hike would have something beautiful to look back on! When it gets tough, keep hanging on because whatever darkness we’re going through—whatever darkness you’re going through right now at this moment—will be followed by the dawn. The sun will come. It will come.

Some days the journey is all uphill. Often the clouds block our view.
But every tunnel in a mountain is a way to get through.
The way may seem steep, and the storm may be strong,
And maybe at times, the journey feels too long,
Every life has darkness when the sun won’t shine,
But life’s about the journey and the climb.

When you want to give up; when you’re tired and worn,
Remember how the fragrant rose wears a dozen thorns.
When you face the mountain, keep on hanging on—
Don’t forget the darkness is followed by the dawn.

It would be more peaceful to sail on calmer seas,
To drift through life in comfort while moving forth with ease.
Fewer tears, if any, would stream from heavy eyes,
And hearts would never break from an unwanted surprise.
At times, the road brings pain and our desires fade,
But after the fiery flames, comes the soothing glade.

When you want to give up; when you’re tired and worn,
Remember how the fragrant rose wears a dozen thorns.
When you face the mountain, keep on hanging on—
Don’t forget the darkness is followed by the dawn.

Never forget the darkness is followed by the dawn.

Everyday Miracles

 "There are no accidents." - Master Oogway, Kung Fu Panda

A discussion about miracles broke out at the studio where I work one day. During it, one of the guys said he hasn't seen any miracles, and surprised, I responded that I see them almost every day. He asked what they were, and I told him- the miracles I notice are the everyday sort of miracles. It's when the traffic lights turn green when I drive the speed limit, snow stops so it'll be safer to drive to church, or when the sun shines through at the right moment. It's when I'm trying to avoid someone who makes me feel uncomfortable, and other people sit beside me before that someone can. It's when I make plans to take a vacation somewhere on my bucket list, and everyone else ditches, but then, a friend says they'll go. It's when I'm feeling down, and a friend sends me a random message or a neighbor brings something over.

These are the sort of things my coworker said he thought were coincidences in his own life. However, growing up, I've heard from many sources, from psychology to the words of prophets and apostles (and even in science not focused on the big bang randomization theory) that there are no coincidences. And I believe that point of view. Maybe there are some small coincidences now and then like our favorite color is blue-green or maybe you like grilled cheese sandwiches as much as I do, but when the happy accidents in our lives happen, I don't believe those are accidents.

And if there are coincidences like my friend thinks, couldn't coincidences be miracles too?

A Gift for All

 Christmas is coming up, and the holiday season often feels chaotic with everything going on. One of the major parts for most of us, I think, is the giving and receiving of gifts.

This past week, I had the opportunity to watch the opening two episodes of The Chosen. I've mentioned the show in a past blog post, and if anyone is unfamiliar with it, I recommend watching it. It's about Christ's ministry and the first twelve apostles. The episodes pick up with Christ's sermon on the mount, the infamous beatitude chapters. There were two parts that stuck out to me clearly, which I've pondered on for many days. The first is about how the Sermon on the Mount was a message for all. There is something in there for everyone. I always tried gleaming as much as possible from it and tried to follow all of the messages at once, whether I needed it at that time or not, but after this past week, I realized that every message, every verse, everything truly good that I read or listen to has a message for me. He said as He has said many times throughout the scriptures, to not be anxious or worried, and that's definitely a message I need.

I've heard that when one writes or gives a speech, to write it or direct it toward one or two individuals. I wonder if Jesus did this when preparing the sermon. Did He think about His disciples? Was there a specific person He considered at the time? Or did he think about all of us- past and future- and say it all at once?

The second thing that stuck out to me was when He sent the twelve out as his apostles. He told them to take nothing with them, and when they questioned Him, He said that He wanted them to rely more on Heavenly Father. How often have I tried to do everything on my own? Honestly, it has been more than I should have. "Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin" (Matthew 6:28). If our Heavenly Father has taken care of all that's on the earth, why wouldn't He watch over and help us?

I think that what He's telling us is to slow down, learn from Him, and focus. He has a gift to give us, and He wants us to hold on long enough to receive that gift- to slow down, stop worrying, and trust in Him. Our Heavenly Father will watch over us, and there's a message and a gift for each of us.

Our Own Gifts

 A movie came out not long ago that many have already heard about. It's called Encanto and is a Disney movie. It isn't my favorite movie and might not even make the top ten, but besides the music, there is one thing I love about it. Every person in la Familia Madrigal has a unique gift, meant to bless others. It's a part of what makes each member unique, even the main character, Mirabel, who thinks she is "giftless." Sure, some gifts are more prevalent than others. There's a flower-producing character, a super-strong sister, a cousin that can change into other people, the main character's mother who can heal people with food, and an aunt that affects the weather. 

But it's not those gifts that I noticed. Mirabel's parents stand up for her when Abuela thinks she's in the way. Cousin Camillo looks out for Mirabel. Tio Bruno gives up using his gift of foresight to protect Mirabel from becoming ostracized. Cousin Antonio has a great love for her, looking up to Mirabel as an older sister. And Mirabel, though she doesn't realize it, has a bit of foresight like Bruno, interacts with animals like Antonio, and has the ability to bring her family together, not to mention the courage she shows. Some gifts were more visible than others, but everyone had a gift or talent to share.

Earlier, I was reading about Christ's visit to his disciples after his resurrection. A handful of them went fishing without luck, and Christ called to them from the shore, telling them to throw their nets on the other side of the boat. When they realized it was the Lord on the beach, they hurried to him and shared a meal. At the end of the chapter, after Jesus asks Peter three times "Do you love me?" and Peter answers him, Jesus foretells Peter's ministry and death. And then Peter asks the Lord about John. I can imagine him saying,

"Lord, it's good that I get to be a teacher and serve the people here. I'm sorry I came back to fish, but I will do better. I will do what you ask of me from now on. By the way, what will John be doing? Will he be doing the same thing, too?"

And Jesus answers, "Does it matter? He has his own responsibility. I was talking to you not him."

Often, I'm caught up in the idea that I need to be doing what others are doing. Many people my age already have careers. Some of them have families. Some are married, living in houses, and seem to have life figured out already. But I think of those words, "He [she] has his [her] own responsibility. I was talking to you," and I think about how each of the Familia Madrigal had gifts and talents that were unique. What others are doing or how they're doing it should not affect how I live or what I do. Each of us is on our own path, and the Lord has different assignments for each of us. Our unique talents and responsibilities make us special, and those gifts don't have to be magical. It's okay if they're simple talents or gifts. Because every gift is necessary.

The Hidden Heroes

 Do you know that story of Ammon and the king's flocks? That one where Ammon joins the Lamanite king's servants to take the animals to the watering hole, and some mean Lamanite guys scare the animals because they wanted to see the king's servants get into trouble? 

There's something I missed before, all of the many times I've read this account in the scriptures. Following the scattering of the flocks, the servants weep because the king will kill them like their brethren before. Ammon comforts them and instructs them to gather the flocks while he contends with the troublemakers. His life is preserved, and he defeats a bunch of vicious guys on his own (Book of Mormon, Alma 17-18).

I have read that the king had killed his servants before, but when the king wonders if Ammon is God, it came to me: Why was Ammon sent at this time to the Lamanites instead of at an earlier time? If he had left his land earlier, he could have saved many more servants from the wrath of the king, right?

Maybe there are two reasons for this: first, maybe those servants with Ammon needed to fear for their lives and be at the depths of humility before they could trust Ammon and the gospel message he wished to share with them, and second, righteous fathers were needed to raise those stripling warriors that came later in the war chapters. Unlike their brethren before, the servants with Ammon were saved just as much as Ammon was, and they became converted to the Gospel of Jesus Christ. 

Some of those servants probably are the fathers mentioned that sent provisions to their sons on the battlefield, not mentioned as often as the mothers of the stripling warriors (Alma 53-58), but they are there.

Just maybe we are saved for greater purposes than we see now. I'm sure the servants of the king were ecstatic to be alive, but they did not know that one day they, too, would be instruments in the hands of the Lord to bring good to pass. Maybe, just maybe, we are like those servants, hidden in the pages of an account and overlooked later on, but even the hidden heroes are still heroes. 

And if that's so, I'm okay to be a hidden hero.

Wrong Roads

 

Whenever I drive past the Provo, Utah temple for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I see an old, orange truck that reminds me of a message Jeffrey R. Holland shared once. Here's the link for the video of it if you're interested: https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/media/video/2013-09-0016-wrong-roads?lang=eng.

I've always liked the story and could somewhat relate to it, of course, but recently, it became more relevant.

Holland told of a time when he took his son to visit some spots in Southern Utah, but as they planned to return home before dark, they came upon a fork in the road. Choosing the wrong road meant that they might end up in a destination far from where they had planned (home), so not knowing which road was the road home, they prayed together and consulted. Both Jeffrey R. Holland and his son felt that they should take a certain road, so they drove down it for a couple of miles and came to a dead end. Knowing that it was not the correct road after all, they turned around and went down the other road. 

His son asked why they had felt prompted to go down the dead-end road if it wasn't the right one, to which Jeffrey R. Holland suggested that perhaps, it was so that they might know with assurance which path was correct. 

A little over a year ago, I began using a bullet journal to plan every week. I got into the habit, and I've accomplished more with it than I ever have by not planning. Sometimes, I even have backup and backup-backup plans because if we don't plan, we lose sight of our dreams. 

And then, something happened that made me feel like I had reached a deadend. Actually, I had reached several dead ends. I was in a rat maze where every path I tried going down was a deadend, but my newest stumbling block was something that I was confident I could get over easily. 

That's not what happened. I made four or five different plans, knowing that I could make it down one of those roads, and then, every single plan failed until I was left hopeless and wondering why I had been allowed to go down each of these paths in the first place.

Wednesday last week, I saw that little orange truck again, and as I thought about it, I realized that maybe, I had not been allowed to act on those plans so that I would fail but that I could succeed with confidence when I came to the correct road.

God expects us to "be believing and not give up, and not panic and not retreat and not jump ship when something doesn't seem to be going just right. We stay in. We keep working" (Jeffrey R. Holland).

And if we do stay in and keep working, everything will work out just fine in the end.

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/media/video/2013-09-0016-wrong-roads?lang=eng.